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CIF Commenters

December 4, 2009

I have a love hate relationship with CIF, and randomly choose a thread to comment on but more often I just read the comments and feel like throwing the laptop out the window.

One of these irritating commenters, Ca1eb, made me laugh very much today with his comments regarding health care policy so I clicked into his profile and have found he has rather a talent for film review such as this:

3 out of 5 people found the following comment useful :-
I am the victim here, 26 October 2004
It’s been ages since I’ve been to a wedding and I used to quite enjoy them. Unlike most people I try and remember all the good things that happen at weddings, like the great presents that I used to buy, or how good I was at dancing or how I managed to kiss the bride, but every body else seems to want to remember the bad stuff, like how I made that kid cry.

Honestly, you can do about a million great things at weddings and people just forget them, but you punch one toddler and suddenly you’re off the invites list. I bet Ghandi must have punched one or two kids in his life, but because he’s Ghandi everyone just ignores it and just remembers the ‘good’ things he did. Like I wasn’t happy about what happened, but it was a church wedding and even the vicar was swearing at me. Oh, and apparently I’m the first person to be barred from churches in the Thames Valley area for 80 years. The last guy who was barred in 1924 had ‘…burning eyes like a snake and a touch as cold as ice’. His representatives managed to get the ban lifted after saying that there was no proof he was Satan and that the decision infringed his civil rights.

What about MY civil rights? Pubs, libraries, Cambridge University, Virgin Airways Flights, ‘The Lounge’ Nightclub, Aylesbury Civic Centre, The City of Milton Keynes and now all the churches in Buckinghamshire have barred me. Clearly I am the victim in all of this. And what the hell are people doing taking kids to weddings anyway? If you can’t be trusted to take a child to a strip show then logic would suggest that at an event when you’re not supposed to stare or try and touch the performer (i.e. the Bride) children are unwelcome. If I went and stood in a boxing ring with a toddler on my shoulders and a glancing blow caught it, would it be the boxer’s fault. No, it would be my fault for being stupid enough to step into a boxing ring with a child. If it happened I’d be the first to own up and say that I was in the wrong, but according to the Church of England and the kid’s parents such an analogy is ‘deranged’.

Can you imagine what would have happened if a parent threw their child into a giant fish tank with ‘Free Willy’ and that stupid orca smacked it with its tail? Do you think people would blame Willy for what happened? No, they’d be all like “oh Willy doesn’t know any better”, or “he was trying to help the child”. Oh yeah sure, whenever he does something clever make out that it’s the best thing in the world, but when he does one bad thing, just put it down to low intelligence.

I rate the ‘Four Weddings and a Funeral’ an average 11 points

There are plenty more to read – Happy Friday.


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